Human infants are the mist dependent of all creatures and for the longest amount of time. We would not have survived as a species if cave mothers had out their offspring in another part of the cave at night or left them for long periods of time during the day. WE may have the means to separate ourselves from out young, but biologically, we weren’t meant to and it still upsets the baby and the mother – Alice Bolster –
I am writing this post to shed light on ‘sleepless nights and sleep deprivation’ & my oh my have we experienced it! Our first daughter had a traumatic exit from my womb, she had horrible misdiagnosed reflux for months, and I tried EVERYTHING, sleep nurses, sleep centres, driving in the car at 3am, walking at insane hours with the pram, controlled crying and a lot of crying myself… It wasn’t until I truly thought about how we were parenting & what our daughters needs were as opposed to our own, that I finally trusted my own motherly instinct. We started co-sleeping, I threw every book that ‘trained’ babies out the door and I started reading books on attachment parenting, books based on Buddhism, books based on responsive settling & no cry solutions, I started to trust my baby and what she needed and that was US!
Six years later and we still hold her hand until she falls asleep, she sleeps all night long and if she doesn’t that’s ok too, we welcome her into our bed with open arms, she needs us night and day… And that’s ok… Who decided that this wasn’t ok?
We have had exquisitely precise instincts,expert in every detail of child care,since long before we became Homo sapiens. But we have conspired to baffle this long standing knowledge so utterly that we now employ professionals to puzzle out how we should behave & raise our own children. – Jean Liedloff –
I myself have been there and done that, it wasn’t until I decided that I was the expert in my own babe, that we would co-sleep safely and baby wear always, until she decided that she didn’t need it… In doing this, it saved my sanity as a mother, it saved my relationship with my husband and it finally made me feel like I wasn’t a failure in this crooked path of motherhood